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ARTICLES The Union article: The nature of the mind is to be constantly changing and looking for new excitements. This changing mind creates an illusory changing external environment. The mind can be compared to a lake - our thoughts are like the waves on the lake. We change our thoughts and desires one after another and these changing thought waves constantly keep the mind in a state of disturbance and stress. So, why don’t we give the mind what it likes? Why can't we go from one excitement to another and satisfy the desires of the mind as a way of finding happiness? Isn’t it what everyone is doing? Eventually we come to realize that we no sooner satisfy one desire than it leads to another ... and happiness is still out of reach. We encounter suffering and not happiness. We fail to find what we are searching for - contentment, peace, deep relaxation, satisfaction and fulfillment. The problem is the futile search for happiness outside of ourselves. We will not experience peace of mind and deep relaxation while our mind is constantly changing. Once we grasp this we understand the necessity to control the mind. We learn that in order to do this we need to have a healthy body and a steady physical posture (asana), because when our body is agitated our mind is also agitated. We need to control the breath, because breath is an energy wave that directly influences the mind (pranayama). Lastly, we need to control our senses because the mind is intimately connected to our senses. If we over-stimulate our senses it makes the mind agitated and we become disconnected from ourselves. Secondly, we need to develop awareness or detachment. The practice of mindfulness brings about both concentration and awareness. We watch the mind, focus the mind and become aware that we are not our mind. Yoga philosophy reveals that we are the Consciousness underlying all. The practice of meditation gives us the ultimate experience of this underlying unhurt, untouched, and eternal Presence of Ourselves. Experiencing that presence is the key to being relaxed and strong in life. Swami Sitaramananda, author of this article, is a senior disciple of Swami Vishnu-devananda and has been a dedicated meditation teacher for more than 20 years. She is originally from Vietnam and is the director of the Sivananda Yoga Farm for more than 10 years. _________________________ Yoga Life article: Intro: I was 28 years old when I came to the ashram. I already had a life behind me as an independent educated adult with a position of responsibility in society. I did not expect that spiritual education could be a different education altogether. In fact it is an unlearn and re-learn process that is at times quite disconcerting. In this system of education, it is difficult to know if you are doing well or have failed in the test. The only thing you have to assess your progress is the look of the Master .. is it quiet, is it approbatory, is it non emotional, is it flaring with disapproval and intensity? His silence and his words count. Most is not transmitted by words. We are so used to words and intellectual explanation of everything that it is difficult to constantly listen to the "inner voice" to distinguish what is the real thing and what is the usual way of reacting that comes from habits and social manners. It is a constant education in turning the gaze within and finding out our inner motives, our emotions, our desires, our contradictions, our unreasonable expectations. I did not know what I had got myself in to. I did not know that I was suffering from a condition quite common to many, a state of fragmentation, stress and disharmony that comes from being disconnected from the divine spirit or being unable to see one's own Self . I did not know that I was a prisoner of my mind and my moods. The radiance emanating from Swamiji was overwhelming and impressive. I felt an unconditional love that was like a fresh breeze in the desert land of normal human relationships. Swamiji was warm, direct, happy and simple. No place for nonsense and complications. I thought: I will carry his shoes to learn from him what is life and how to behave. At 28, I knew already that my academic learning and professional achievements did not give me the formula to understand about myself and about my life, how to be happy and how everything fits together. I was ready to learn something else, but I did not know what . I did not know that this learning involved the learning of "I know that I don't know" then learning of " I don't know that I know" then learning of "I know that I know" .... all about the ego and non ego and how to manage the ego and the mind for true knowledge to happen. Swamiji gave me the job of being the accountant in the ashram. This was the worst thing my mind liked to do. If it was not for him, I would have quit and walked out of the ashram. At that time, there was no accountancy software nor computers. Accountancy meant endless times reporting by hand from register book to register book and adding everything up by hand. The numbers played tricks on me... or someone must have changed the numbers in the accounts at night, because the columns never added up and I spent days and nights trying to make things right in this ungrateful small accounts office. I took the financial stress of the ashram to heart and could not understand Swamiji's light hearted ness about it. He used to laugh and say: "I am a minus millionaire!" and then he said: "It is not our money, so we have to take care of it even more carefully than it is our own, because we are administering God's money." Mistakes of even a few cents was not allowed. Honesty to the utmost detail was to be expected. Thus I learnt my first lessons of Karma Yoga. I learnt to overcome the sense of doership, of likes and dislikes that distorted my mind and I learnt to do my duty carefully because I worked for God. I always thought that Swamiji, the great being that he was, would be teaching me something extraordinary. My romantic mind would like to believe that spiritual life was something quite out of the ordinary , like many of the books I had read about secret teachings of the masters etc.. I did not know that spiritual life was made of the day to day details, no more no less, except that the whole inner attitude was completely different. Swamiji asked two of us to come to his house for a special session to teach us about accountancy and mathematics. He said, "if S. gave $10 dollars to his daughter to go buy candies at the market, she spent $5, then how much is left?" The question that came out from this Yoga Master was abruptly simple and straightforward. It could not be that this was what he asked, I thought. It must be a test question. I must find the answer somewhere... in between the lines. So I fumbled, choked and could not reply. "$10 minus $ 5 must equal something else", I thought. Swamiji, irritated, spurred out after seeing our confused demeanor...: " Ten minus five is...? ...five!" This is the answer. I knew the answer, but I thought that I did not know. I tried to put myself in his mind and be smarter than him. I learned on that day that spiritual life is really very simple and straightforward. It is not a fancy or a product of our imagination. The mind needs to be straightened out and become more clear, not become more complicated. Swamiji also taught me to drive. I was a driver before coming to the ashram , but driving him was quite a venture. You felt the great responsibility of your task, driving the most important person. He always sat in the back seat and was a real "back seat driver!" . I learned from him to be careful and attentive, a necessary quality for Yogis. He said: " when you arrive at a Stop, Stop. Look Right, look Left, then go" . Swamiji words were powerful , charged with prana. His instructions remained with you for the rest of your life. I learnt in this instance that spiritual life is about abiding to rules. Swamiji who was an internationally famous peace missionary, the one who flew across international borders without authorization, taught me to be careful and to follow traffic laws. You have to follow rules, and bend the delinquent mind, before you can transcend the mind and the rules. Swamiji taught us to be considerate. We learnt to remember each other at meals time, to pay attention not to hurt anyone feeling, to care for the sick, to love those in need, to accept our lot and not being envious or jealous... He taught us to constantly tune to each other and not to act egoistically. One time, I got myself in an accident , driving in the snow . The car spun and I got myself embanked. I thought Swamiji would scold me for creating the accident and damaging the car.On the contrary, Swamiji asked me to come to his house, and showered me with warmth, hot drinks, cookies. I learnt simple warm human care from this spiritual giant. Swamiji taught us to be ethical and correct. Ethical conduct is the basis of all religious teaching. Swamiji made us understand clearly what is right and wrong. We understood the importance of being vigilant . Under his look, all lies and hidden motives were discovered. In his presence, everyone was on their best behavior. Punishment for wrong conduct was to write pages of mantras. The leader of the group also got the punishment of mantra writing for allowing the wrong doing to happen. Swamiji gave people long ropes, ample warnings, repeated reminders, and finally the removal of privileges, and the ultimate sanction was to leave the ashram. This last measure is never taken deliberately. It was the spiritual child that decided to turn away from God and not God turning away from him or her. Books have always been my fascination. One day - to protect the books - Swamiji took all the books of the ashram and put them in his private library! I was shocked by the prospect of losing my refuge. There were no ways to escape in the ashram. Always this stern daily discipline, meditate, do Yoga asanas, pranayama and relentless karma yoga. I was taking refuge in books, where my mind could escape to some other mental horizons. Swamiji said: "You already read too much . You need to unlearn. " I did not know the necessity to not store more information in the mind... to keep it focused and clear. Spiritual learning occurs automatically anyway when the mind is purified and free from clutter and egoistic ideas. Scriptural teachings or Gurus' teachings can be directly understood by silence, reverence and proper tuning and not necessarily by study or any intellectual process. Obedience and Self Surrender are important practices in the Gurukula. Obedience is the training of the mind to be quiet to allow the higher mind to operate. News of the outside world came to the ashram through Swamiji who played the role of news anchor, giving commentaries to world events at our daily satsangs. It took me a long time to understand why he would be so immersed in world news when he wouldn't allow us to indulge in news, radio, TV, newspaper, Time Magazine. Again this necessity to build up discriminative faculty and the necessity to shield and protect the young spiritual mind from influences, not making it weaker, but on the contrary making it stronger by leading a simple and focused life, away from distractions , overload of useless information, and emotionalism. One learns that caring for the world is not becoming involved in the world drama , but caring about raising our own vibrations and taking care of our own purity of mind. Living in the wake of this living universal mind made us at the same time feel in a very direct way, that the world was our family. Swamiji wass concerned about the welfare of the whole world and not only of our little world. Being part of his international organization brought us in contact with many races and cultures and helped to break down all our national, racial or gender vanity. We learnt to serve and to find joy in serving all, like we would serve God. Swamiji honored people with high intention and those who did good for the world, no matter their field of expertise or mode of operation. Many such great souls came to the ashram as his special guests, teachers and speakers. He exposed us to many different ideas and teachings. Thus we learnt in the Gurukula to be tolerant and to be open to diversity. More than that, we learnt that there was something common in all apparent diversities. "Unity in Diversity" was not just a slogan or motto, but was truly lived and experienced. Arrogantly I had doubt Swamiji many times when confronted with situations that my mind could not comprehend. During these times, I often had tendency to jump to conclusions and to judge his actions. Swamiji is not fair, Swamiji is unjust, Swamiji is partial , Swamiji doesn't know , etc... I learnt that what I thought of him always mirrored back to my own mind clinging to something. I learnt to slow down my reactions and learnt to see things from many angles. The universe was like a kaleidoscope, you just shift a little and all appears different. This unceasingly changing universe was fascinating and disappointing at the same time. How can you trust it? Yet, Swamiji seemed to be quite certain of what he was doing. He seemed always going forward, not being deterred by anything. His self confidence was coming from somewhere, not from his ego and mind . His fast and spontaneous decisions seemed to be backed up by the universe as things always turned out as he thought. I learnt that the purified mind functions differently, not motivated by impulses and emotions , not governed by intellect, but moved by intuition. Intuition can not make mistakes, coming from a higher source. Swamiji said:" I received orders from above!" . Literally, he received orders from above. Tuning to his mind and observing his mind within one own self is a very liberating venture! "Why don't you ask me?" he scolded us. So we learnt to rely on him for everything. Then the opposite instructions came: "Why do you not think for yourself !" ..so we learnt to take responsibility and to think for ourselves. As soon as we did so, he again said : " who gave you the authorization for this?" and then again " do not take my time, do something about it!" Thus we were moulded, a balance between dependence and independence, self reliance and interdependence. Swamiji seemed to be quite difficult to please. Generally when he was pleased, he was silent. You learnt that perfection or correctness was the normal order of things. When he alluded to something, it would be something he pointed out about your ego. When he praised you, flattered and thanked you, it was like pin pricks. Something must be wrong! He taught us through paradoxes. Many times, I found myself thinking: "Swamiji, please make up your mind, tell us once and for all what you expect from us. It is so tiring to try to figure out what is right." Life would be easier I thought if only there was only one way of acting or reacting, one mode of being. On the contrary, life seemed to be quite complex, a mixture between being flexible and being strong . Head, heart , hands were put to test. Head , heart and hands were expected to work together . Testing was Swamiji's normal way of seeing how your mind reacted to situations. He read your thoughts, evaluated your mind, pushed you. You read his thoughts , evaluated your mind, pushed yourself to fit his expectations. Thus you transcended the limitations of your own mind, faced your own fears and hang ups, and discovered your innate potential. Trust was an important element. The same as a mother encouraging the first steps of the young child, Swamiji encouraged you and coached you in your first steps as a Yogi. You did not know the real motivation behind his actions. The only
thing you knew was that he must have a good motivation behind all his
thoughts and actions, this single desire to help, educate and uplift. You
learn love and surrendering to love through the contact with love. You
learn selflessness through the real life contact with selflessness. Swamiji's
interest was your interest. He was you and you were him. He was all the
people he was taking care of. He was the world and the world was him. How
can you really live this statement in real life? One morning, he said
to us these touching words: "I could hire people that work better
than you. The tractor works better than you, but I prefer working with
you, because you have golden hearts and I love you". Bearing patiently
our mistakes, our slothful and careless manners must have come from his
infinite love. Taking actions to help us working out our karmas must
have been his constant concern. One day he sent me to buy a bunch
of bonsais. They were expensive and I did not really know them well,
nor know how to take care of them. I was questioning his motives for
sending me to buy the bonsais. Coming from Asia, bonsais are important
in my mind. I was wondering if Swamiji had helped me to satisfy some
of my subconscious desires, to free me from my mind and identification.
This could have been the reason or not at all. The ego mind searched
in vain for reasons. After some time, the ego mind gave up thinking...
it is not so important any more what his motivation was you and
him are one and outside actions are not so important. Any opportunity is an opportunity for learning. He encouraged me to build a house, made of wood logs. It was a learning opportunity for the staff, not only to learn a new skill, but also a lesson in endurance and concentration. We were building the 24ft X 24ft house in the snow , 20-30 degree below zero. We were inexperienced and a few of us could not even roll over one huge log 30 ft long. Many times our minds collapsed in the endeavor, negative thoughts flooded our minds just thinking of the impossibility of the task and our frozen hands and exhaustion. Swamiji came daily to visit the construction field, giving us a few bars of chocolate and a few jokes. We dealt daily with our resisting minds. We woke up at 4am, did our meditation, chanting and satsangs then worked physically 8 hours in the cold. We squeezed in at the end of the day a mandatory asanas class for our overworked muscles, sitting in meditation when the body just wanted to collapse in sleep ! I learned the first irrevocable truths about Yoga. IT WORKS! Without the pranayama and Yoga asana class daily , the chanting sessions and sittings, we would never have been able to achieve such a feat! building a house in 10 days! I learned experimentally the power of the mind, the importance of positive thoughts, and the value of daily Yoga practice, even in the most trying and mentally-physically impossible conditions. I learnt how Yoga allowed us to become superhuman, going beyond our limitations. Transcending the bodily needs, not over worrying about the body and our mental likes and dislikes, reaching out to this inexhaustible universal storehouse of energy with our will, our positive mind and our devotion constitute the daily training in the ashram. There were meals that were missed because of some more urgent tasks to attend to, there were sunny days that were missed because of the necessity to concentrate on some indoor works, there were days with good food and bad days with bad food, joyful days with positive company and unbearable days with people you did not ask to be in your lives and yet they were there daily sharing your moments and your space. There were aggravations of other people that spoiled your own quality of life, and your own aggravations that spoiled other people's lifes. Daily the learning and learning that we are one, no matter what, realization achieved only by diving deep,very deep ...by taking recourse to those skills learned in satsangs and lectures... discriminate between the real and the unreal, the Self and the Not Self , the Permanent and the Impermanent, that which lifts you up and that which brings you down.... dispassion, compassion, forgiveness,control of the mind and emotions.Seeing the Self in All. How do you see the Self in all , if not by experiencing multitudes of circumstances and people and at the same time keeping the sublime thoughts of your real self in your heart? Life in the Gurukula system is amazingly intense and rich. It is not running away from life, but facing it . It is a life of Yogic purification. It is painful and many times one is confronted with all kinds of negative emotions, anger, frustrations, attachments, jealousy, lust, greed, doubts, depression, despair...How do you become detached and see the mental patterns? By experiencing, confrontation, transformation, willingly or not, and by grace, knowingly or not. Learning to keep going no matter what is the biggest lesson. After all, it is just a big game,an illusion, a play and we just need to play our act to learn our lessons. It is not about winning or losing, it is not about our separate life and identity. It is about something beyond our own ideas. Faith is the final recourse. Faith in the words, the teachings of the Guru. Faith in oneself and one 's capacity to succeed in Self realization. The teaching in Gurukula is the teaching in miniature of real life. Arjuna learned his biggest spiritual lesson on the battlefield. The Gurukula system of education is the grace of the Guru to help us overcoming our illusions. Learning devotion is a difficult learning. It is said that devotion is contagious. Swamiji's devotion to his Guru, Master Sivananda, was contagious. We felt Master Sivananda intimately very close to us because of Swamiji's nearness to him. We love Krishna, Rama, Lord Vishnu, the Devi -Divine Mother- because Swamiji loved them with all his being. God becomes intimately close to us because we connect and witness his love of God. A door directly opens to us and connects us with heaven. This is the greatest gift. At the end of his life, Swamiji cried and sobbed with tears of devotion, he talked to his vision of Sita, Rama and Hanuman, he bowed to trees and to us, his disciples. He went unceasingly on pilgrimages visiting temples to have darshan of God. His heart melted as he became a spiritual child. Our heart melts as we become his spiritual child. Om tat sat. |
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